The Best Jokes are at JokeCenter.com
| Best Jokes | New Jokes | Cartoons | Joke Videos | Read Jokes | Tell us a Joke | Contact Us |
Categories
Beer Jokes109
Blonde Jokes288
Bush Jokes1
Business Jokes130
Cat Jokes8
Christmas Jokes80
Clinton Jokes46
Computer Jokes75
Confucius Jokes58
Doctor Jokes17
Education Jokes102
Entertainment Jokes44
Female Jokes39
Gender Jokes67
Golf Jokes23
Halloween Jokes40
Hannukah Jokes1
Insults Jokes50
International Jokes18
Jewish Jokes9
Lawyer Jokes68
List Jokes25
Male Jokes35
Mamma Jokes183
Medical Jokes119
Misc Jokes1061
News Jokes10
Pickup Jokes65
Politics Jokes113
Redneck Jokes62
Relationship Jokes266
Religion Jokes169
Scifi Jokes10
Sex Jokes446
Signs Jokes86
Sports Jokes47
Starwars Jokes13
Thanksgiving Jokes18
Viagra Jokes30
 


Return to the List Joke List

50 fun things to do at Wal-Mart

Joke submitted by: Anonymous


50 Fun Things To Do At Wal-Mart

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day

4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly, especially in thin aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off and turn the volume up to full blast.

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen you in so long." etc. See if they play along.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"

15. Repeat #14 in the jewelry department.

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are taking it for a test drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet behind them. Do this until they leave the store.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow, magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.

29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between them yelling "Red Rover."

31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples)

32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.

33. Take bets on the battle from above.

34. Test the brushes and combs in cosmetics.

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission Impossible.

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies."

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: Marco Polo

43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet section, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's.

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."

49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.


*BONUS*


1. Attempt to do all of the above in the same visit, without getting kicked out.

2. Try to hold up customers with the toy guns. See how much you can make.



6411 voters gave this joke a 3.9 rating.
How would you rate it?
12345
Terrible (1) < - - > Outstanding! (5)

Read other good List jokes?

Send to Friend

digg digg this     delicious add to del.icio.us     StumbleUpon stumble it     Reddit reddit




Join Mailing List
Your E-mail Address:


Search
Search for:


Sponsored Links



| Best Jokes | New Jokes | Tell us a Joke | Contact Us |

| Imagine-NET.com | HouseofQuotes.com | JobsList.com | JokeCenter.com | LinkMania.com | SiteQuick.com |


Copyright 1998-2018 by Imagine-NET Internet Services - All Rights Reserved