The bartender says, "What the heck is that?"

The customer replies "It's my hand phone..give me your home number so you can try it."

With that, the bartender gives him his home number and the customer punches the numbers in on his hand and puts his hand up to the bartender's ear. The bartender's wife answers and he (who is very amazed) says, "I...honey... just thought I'd call you and tell you I love you....ok...bye."

The bartender says, "That's amazing! How do you get one?"

"I'll tell you when I get back from the restroom."

30 minutes later there is no sign of the customer and the bartender is getting concerned so he walks to the restroom to make sure the guy is ok. When he enters he finds the guy with his pants around his ankles, bent over with his palms on the wall and a long piece of toilet paper hanging out of his butt.

"What the hell are you doing?" asks the incredulous bartender.

"Give me a second," the man replies as he grunts and groans, "I'm getting a fax."